Book Review: A New Name

Emma Scrivener is a Christian, a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a blogger, a speaker and an author but she also suffers from anorexia.

I started following Emma’s blog “A New Name” months ago and love the way she wrote and the topics she wrote about were all very interesting and relevant – open and honest.  Then I heard her speak at a Women’s conference in May 2015, she is an excellent speaker, again open and honest about her life as an anorexic and her life as a Christian as well.

Emma has also written a book with the same name as her blog, “A New Name” and recently read it. Again it is a very open and honest account of her life – very refreshing having someone be so honest. Before I read the book or heard Emma speak, I did not know much about anorexia or how it affects people who suffer from it, so for me the book was a very interesting read and educational.

Not only was Emma affected by the illness of anorexia but her family were affected by it as well. It stood between them as a family, and relations were difficult between her and her parents as well as between her and her siblings.  Most meal times turned into a war zone with her parents trying to make Emma eat and Emma refusing to do so.  And her sister and brother felt side-lined from the family as Emma got all the attention.

Emma’s illness affected her schooling, her friendships, her career and later as her marriage and her desire to become a mother.

When some people think of Anorexia they think of skinny models.  But as Emma says, “The face of anorexia is not a glossy model in a perfume ad, it is a starving animal, circling the empty cupboards, black eyes and vacant.  It’s a face frozen grim, mouthing lies.  I’m fine, it says, ‘Everything is under control”.  When in reality nothing was find and in her mind she is too fat but always hungry.

Emma reluctantly went to doctors for help as her parents needed to as they were desperate to get her back to normal.  Emma fought against all this during her teenage years and felt it never did any help.  When she relapsed into anorexia again in her adult years, she voluntary went to the doctors but still fought back against the doctor’s advice as even though she knew she wasn’t alright, she felt all was ok.

Emma is now in recovery from her illness and gives all the credit and thanks to God helping her out of the pain she lived in.  As she says “What preserved me was the mercy of God”

In describing her illness and what she lived through, Emma was very vivid and true.

One of her favourite poems is called “Not waving but drowning” by Stevie Smith.  The title says it all, “You can appear to the world like you have got it together – right place, right time, right behaviour – yet still be in serious trouble.”

The above quote is relevant to us all, smiling on the outside, dying in the inside.  We must be perceptive to other people and how they are feeling.  Not being push but just offering our hand of support and friendship, this means a lot of those who suffer from illnesses.

Emma also says that “for those watching people with anorexia there is only helplessness and horror” and for Emma, some days, “all that existed was the hallway between my bedroom and the bathroom.  Too weak to get back up and too broken ever to recover”

It is a great book, very insightful into the world of anorexia.

Emma is from Northern Ireland as I am.  And in the book she writes some things about the Northern Irish which I found interesting and also agreed with.  She writes “as a people, we can be somewhat schizophrenic – caught between opposing and sometimes competing desires.  Reticence is part of our national character but contrasts with a natural gregariousness, a passion for words and relationships.  We are renowned for being both tight-fisted and open-handed”

And also, “The Irish have a strength and a dark humour that’s born out of struggle – whether against famine or war. Yet it comes at a cost, as history testifies, we rarely forgive or forget.  Time mutes the stench and stain of blood, but the old scars remain”

I will state now that this doesn’t cover all people from Northern Ireland, that would be a huge generalisation, but it does cover most of us. Though we are all different, but probably not as different as some of them like to think!

The other bit that I agreed with was “We have a long tradition of telling stories against ourselves and dishing out what’s known as a ‘joke with a jag’ – a steely criticism candid in jest”

All is all I recommended you read this book and follow Emma’s blog.  They both offer something for everyone not just those suffering from anorexia.