Flash Fiction: Mind Games

Why do we always have to do this, join hands and say grace before every meal, it is so boring. Every morning, noon and night, well when we are in the house anyway, we cannot start our meals until grace is said.  It doesn't matter if there are two or us or all eight of us, we have to hold hands and either sing or listen to dad before we can sit down.

Tonight mum called dinner time twenty minutes ago and I have been waiting at the table with Dad, Mum and little Joey but we have to wait until my two brothers, my younger sister and my Granda, who lives with us, all arrive at the table.  Sometimes Granda Joe can take ages to come because he is so slow.  Finally after another five minutes wait and countless shouts upstairs to everyone, the whole clan has gathered at the table. Let the hand holding and grace begin.

I know I should be concentrating on what is being said, but I can’t, my mind is wandering, lots of different thoughts going through my head, but hey wait a minute that’s not one of my thoughts, someone is putting words into my head.  What’s going on?

Am I hearing other people’s thoughts, am I reading their minds, what’s going on? So many random thoughts and words going through my mind and I can’t piece them together. I need to concentrate hang on, what’s this “I wish Jennifer would call me back, why is she avoiding me”. Who is Jennifer and who is she avoiding, can only be two people really, Daniel and Josh, my two big brothers. I doubt Granda Joe has a woman on the go and Dad, well dad would never cheat on my mum, would he?

Oh here comes another thought, I am not sure I like being able to read their minds because am not liking what I hear, “I so wish Deborah would not wear clothes like that, she looks so out of sorts, who will want to marry her” ahhhh, why is my mum thinking those things about me. She is so nice to my face but that’s how she really sees me, as non-marriage material. Well thanks so much Mother!

“I so want a smoke, just right now, would be so nice. I can’t believe Josh believed me when I told him it was normal nicotine in my snuff box, that boy wouldn’t know what marijuana was if it hit him in the face!”  What was this, Daniel has got a stash of marijuana in his room….. Why is he keeping it away from me? Ah wait till I tell Mum this. Maybe this mind reading business isn't so bad after all, think of all the information I can gather on others and then use it on them to get my way. Good old fashioned blackmail and fun! 

Flash Fiction: Twisting Words

“That’s not what I said, why do you always do this, twist everything I say and take the negatives and not the positives of what I am telling you”

“But you said you didn't want to be my friend”

“I did not say that, my exact words were, I need space. I need a personal life.  I want to be friends but I can’t do it this way, it’s painful”

“So you are walking away? Everyone walks away from me at some point”

“NO, I AM NOT WALKING AWAY.  Flip you exhaust me.  I am still here for you, just not as much as before. Do you understand that?”

“OK”

“OK what? Do you understand?”

“Yes I understand. I push people away and no one wants to be my friend”

“You are so blinking frustrating and its comments like that which sends people away. I am trying to still be here for you but you are driving me to the limits. I can’t take much any more”

“I am sorry. I am a failure”

“Stop twisting things and stop being so negative. People love you, I love you, accept that”

“OK, I will try”

“I do love you. I do care about you. I always will. I am not walking away from you. I am here for you, but I need space”

“OK”

“OK.  You do have friends but things can’t always be how you want them to be.  You need to try and be more content in your own self and accept things the way they are.  You can’t change your circumstances but you can change how you behave in them”

“OK. I am and have been trying to be all this”

“I know, and keep going. You are doing well. One day at a time”

“One day at a time”

Flash Fiction: Bullet through the Pain

As the bullet tore through flesh and bone I prayed the hole would give my inner pain an escape route.  Pain I have been suffering from for months, years even.  Pain that took over my whole body, tearing at my heart and bringing drummers to my head.

I thought about how to take my pain away, how it would be great to be free from the pain and life a life pain free.  But I never thought this would be a way out.  I wasn’t looking for this to happen, it just happened.  I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, or did it end up being the right time?

I was feeling low and decided one way to make me feel better was chocolate and ice cream, but there wasn’t any in the house which forced me to go to the local shop.  First time I had stepped outside the house in weeks.  Little did I know that this was going to change my life?

When I got to the shop it was quiet, well at quarter to midnight on a Wednesday night you would expect it to be quiet. Most people would have been tucked up in their beds not seeking comfort food!  In the shop, along with me and the shopkeeper there were two other customers - then all hell broke loose.

I had just arrived at the till to buy my Ben & Jerry’s Peanut Butter Ice Cream and a massive bar of Galaxy chocolate, when two men came through the door wearing balaclavas, brandishing guns and yelling at me to get to the ground.  I couldn’t move, I was shocked and rooted to the floor. I was stunned. 

“Get on the floor” one of the men yelled at me again while pointing the fun at me.  I tried to move but I couldn’t. I was frozen to the spot.  “Get down on the floor, or I will shoot you”.  My brain was trying to tell my body to move but my body was being stubborn and not moving.

Then all of a sudden my body moved, but not on its own accord - I had been shot and the impact of the bullet threw me to the floor.

I was in agony, the pain in my body was excruciating but the pain in my heart and soul was starting to leave.  What was happening to me?

I opened my eyes and the light was bright.  So bright I had to close them again. A few minutes later I reopened them and a man was standing before me reaching his hand out to me – I grabbed it and he pulled me up.  The pain was gone.  The inner pain and the outer pain.  I was free.  But why?

“Where am I?” I asked the man

“You are with me child”, he replied

Now I realised why my pain had disappeared.  That gunshot had killed me.  My escape route had arrived without me even looking for it.

Flash Fiction: Said the Spider to the Fly

“What are you doing here?”

“I was just flying around when I got caught up here in your web”

“It’s my web, belongs to me, it is not for strangers, but then again us spiders like it when our food comes to us instead of having to go out and catch it”

“Please don’t eat me, I am not that tasty”

“Of course you are tasty, all flies are tasty”

“But I am not tasty, I taste all mouldy and horrible”

“Let me be the judge of that”

“Nooooo, please”

“Ok, well ok, for the moment anyway. I had a massive lunch so am not that hungry anymore, but you are in my home and you can’t escape. Do you like me web?”

“Yes, it is lovely”

“Why do you think we create webs?”

“Because you need somewhere to live?”

“No, try again”

“Because you want to show people how creative and talented are with your spinning skills?”

“No try again”

“I don’t know. I am just a fly, I am not that smart!”

“It is so we can capture other insects that dare come near us. To snare them into our traps”

“But why?”

“Well, so we can survive”

“Survive?”

“Yes, survive by eating all you lovely flies etc.  Now come here you tasty looking thing”

“Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.  Don’t eat me.  I have children, they will miss their daddy”

“Too late, you are trapped. Ha Ha Ha!”

Flash Fiction: The Explosion

It was the evening time and I was sitting in school in my mum’s classroom while she was at a parent’s teacher evening in the assembly hall.  She dragged me along as she did not want to leave me in the house with my sister in case we fought.  It was weird being at school in the evening with none of my classmates around, and it was dark and eerie without the usual sound of loads of school children around.  I was feeling a bit scared.

But that scared feeling was about to get ten times worse.  There I was playing on the computer minding my own business when the school shook and there was a noise so loud it felt like the earth had cracked in two.  I had heard explosions before but none this big or loud. It felt like the explosion was close by and I was expecting the school to fall down around me at any time. I was alone and petrified.

I ran from the classroom and down the stairs to find my mum.  She was on her way to me. I ran into her arms crying, she hugged me and told me everything would be all right.

“What was that explosion Mum?”

“I don’t know but it was very loud and massive”

“Where was it, it sounded so close? Did you feel the school shake?”

“Yes, and it shook for a good while and the sound rumbled for ages.  The windows trembled and I thought they were going to come in around us”

“Was it a bomb or an earthquake?”

“It was probably a bomb as earthquakes don’t usually happen in Northern Ireland.  It sounded like a very large bomb, unlike anything I have ever experienced before”

“It sounded so close.  What about Dad and Chrissie?”

“Chrissie is on her own, we need to go home now and make sure she is ok. Dad’s away at a church meeting. I am sure they are both ok”

We grabbed out things and ran to the car.  I had never seen my Mum arrive as fast a she did that right.  We got home to find my sister standing on the door step in tears, scared.

“Mum, what happened, where was that? I thought you and Joey would be dead, it was so close and loud.  Was it a bomb? The whole house shook and I thought the windows would come in around me”

“Yes it must have been a bomb, but I have no idea where it was”

“What about Dad, is he ok?”

“I am not sure sweetheart, am sure he will be ok.  Let’s go inside and wait for him, it is cold outside”

So we went inside the house, and first thing we did was put on the kettle for a much needed cup of tea, after all tea solves all the world’s problems! After about five minutes of worrying about where our Dad was and if he was ok, the front door banged and in he ran. Never was I so happy to see my father, we were all safe. They hadn’t got us this time.  

Flash Fiction: Hole in a Bucket

“What do you mean there is a hole in the bucket?”

“It means exactly what it means, there is a hole in the bucket.”

“Dear Liza, Dear Liza!”

“What?”

“Well it reminded me of the song so thought would finish the line off, dear Henry!”

“Hardy ha ha”

“Okay, seriously, what’s going on?”

“You know the bucket that we have been using to carry the finished beer we have been brewing, over to the kitchen to put the finished product into bottles?”

“Yeah!”

“Well there is a hole in the bucket, so every time we have carried the beer in the bucket from the garage to the kitchen via the living room, it has been leaking out of the hole in the bottom of the bucket”

“So?”

“Well the living room carpet is now completely stained with the beer”

“WHAT? My mum will kill me, what do I do? What do we do now?”

“Well we could fix it, dear Henry, fix it!”

“ENOUGH WITH THE SONG”

“Okay okay man, chill out am just having a laugh”

“Well this is not a funny situation, nothing to laugh at here, my Mum will kill me”

“You started it!”

“Well now I am finishing it, because this is serious stuff now.  My Mum will freak out when she sees what we have done to her carpet.  She will either ground me for life, or worse, kill me!  What do we do?”

“What about the smell of the alcohol?”

“I know! What do we do?”

“Well I don’t know what you are going to go, but I know what I am going to do. I am out of here.  Bye Bye!

“Some friend you are”

“I am your friend, it’s just your mum scares me too”

“You wuss”

“What you mean I am a wuss, you are the run who has been running around going, ahhh what will I do, my Mum’s going to kill me”

“Oi, don’t mimic me. But it is true, she probably will kill me. We need to get it cleaned up”

“Just go buy a nice rug and put it over it, tell her you thought the place needed brightened up. It will do the trick”

“Hey, that’s not a bad idea, let’s go rug shopping”

Flash Fiction: The Unwanted Guest

Oh my word, can life get any more complicated.  Just two months ago I started a new life – moved out of the parental home, got married and moved in with the wife.  It was two months of married bliss, we were still in the honeymoon period and nothing was going to ruin that.  Nothing.  We were happy and enjoying out time together with no intrusions.  Nothing was going to ruin that.  Nothing. But that all changed with the ring of the doorbell.

Last night while my wife and I were enjoying a candle let dinner to celebrate two months of being married, our doorbell rang.  Initially we ignored it as we did not want to be disturbed, but the doorbell kept ringing and whoever was behind it was pretty insistent.  The noise was annoying so I decided it was best to answer the door and had the best intentions of telling the person behind it to go far away.

However when I opened the door I realised those words would not work or even ever be able to come out of my mouth because there standing on my doorstep was my mother! I was speechless.

What’s wrong with that I hear you say, mothers are lovely?  Yes they are lovely, and I love my mum to bits. But….. it was what stood beside my mother which shocked me, because standing beside her was four suitcases and other prized possessions of my mother’s.

Since I had been standing quiet at the door for a few minutes, my wife came to see what was happening as she was a bit concerned.  She took one look at me, then at my mother and back to me and said “What’s going on here?”

I just stood there, still speechless while my Mum said, “I am moving in with you both!”

“What did you just say?” I replied

“I said, I am moving in”

“What, where, why and how?”

“The what is that I am moving in with you both, the where being into your house, this house, the one on whose doorstep I am standing right now being blocked by you, the why is because your father has kicked me out and I have nowhere else to do, and the how – well youa re going to carry my bags in while I walk over the threshold of the door!!”

“But why, why here?”

“I told you, I have nowhere else to go”

“No, no it’s too small here”

“I am moving in, that’s that! You are my Son.  I am your mother.  You looked after me so now you are too look after me!”

“No, no we can’t…..”

I looked at my wife for backup, but she being very afraid of my mother just looked at me and said, “Come on Alex, be a good son and carry your mother’s bags up to the spare room”

I look over at Gemma, my wife with disbelief on my face.  How was I going to cope living in the same house as my mother and wife?  So I did what any sensible person would do in this situation, got my coat and walked out the front door and said, “Enjoy ladies.  I am going to go and live with Dad! Have fun! And with that I closed the door and walked away! 

Prompt: A man’s mother decides to move in with him unannounced

TV Review: Crossing Lines Season 2

Season 2 of Crossing Lines is just as good as the first season, but the ending was unsatisfactory as it left me with a lot of questions and needing season 3 to come on Amazon prime quickly.

Season 1 ended with Louis and his wife Rebecca being held hostage, so season 2 starts with their lives hanging in balance.  Don’t want to say what the outcome of this is as want you to watch the series and wanting to spoil it for you.

Genovese – the sex trafficking criminal who was on season 1 and played by Kim Coates is back in Season 2. He returns in the second episode and again in the sixth episode where he is awaiting trial. He tries to buy a way out of prison but offering to give the ICC valuable information regarding the sex trafficking ring, but the ICC don’t bite and the trial goes ahead.

Of course there is more crimes being solved this season which include

• A sniper who is randomly killing innocent people
• A string of teen suicides
• A biker gang doing home invasions
• And, the disappearance of several back packers.

In the final two episodes of the season, a lot of stuff has been going down:

• Eva went to Spain to chase a ghost
• Tommy gets shot
• And the team are investigating a gang who are committing robberies but apparently not stealing anything, which has the team all confused.
• Louis gets shot

So yes the season ends on a cliff-hanger or a few of them to be exact.  Needing and wanting season three to come out very quickly.  I hate waiting to find out the answers of the open questions.  It is a great season and it is a great series.  Yes it may be a crime show but it is a crime show with a difference and I love the fact it has many different nationalities involved and not just American. 

TV Review: Breaking Bad - The End

I have finally managed to get to the end of Breaking Bad – five seasons done and dusted.  The final season is broken into two parts and as the last season (four) finished with the death of Gus Fring, now season 5 starts with Walter erasing all his links to the murder.

Walter also starts his own Meth operation along with Jesse and Mike (a former employer of Gus who used to make life hell for Jesse and Walt.  They have no lab to produce the meth in so they end up setting up a portable laboratory and move it from location to location under the guise of Vamamos Pest – a pest control company run by burglars.

In order to make the meth the trio need to get more methyl-amine. They find out lots of it is coming in by train so they decide to rob the train which ends up in the killing of an innocent child. This results in Jesse leaving the business due to remorse and guilt at all those Walt has killed in the process of all the meth making.  Mike also decided to leave due to the DEA being on his tail.

Since Gus is dead, the DEA think Mike is the best person to talk to about his death and to find out information on the drug business Gus had.  But Mike burns or buries all the evidence which links him to Gus and his businesses.  Despite this setback, it looks like the DEA are closing in on the real Heisenberg as Hank makes a shocking discovery while over at Walter’s for dinner.  Remember they are brothers in law.

I don’t really want to say anymore on this as it will give away a massive spoiler alert and don’t want it to spoil things for those who have not yet watched Season 5 or the entire series. But will just say that the season ends in a deadly confrontation, but will not tell you who is in that confrontation or the outcome.

When this season ended it made me want to know what happens to Jesse. I really warmed about him  and would love to see a spin off based around him.

Overall the season was a good one and the ending befit the rest of the series.  It is a brilliant series though there are some episodes which are nonsense episodes and feel like time fillers.  But then there are some great episodes as well. 

MS: Don't Lose Hope

Another blog I follow is Positive About MS and the latest blog post was an excellent one which spoke to me and I felt the need to share it as it is something I need to read and read regularly and am sure it will resonate with others as well. 

"Every storm has an end. Think about it. There is not one hurricane, tornado, tsunami or flood that is still swirling the skies threatening destruction. Every storm has come to an end. Some bring great fear and destruction along with them, but they all have an end.

You have endured some tremendous storms of your own in your lifetime. Storms that seemed to come out of nowhere and slammed into you full force. No warning, no preparations, but you made it through. You endured some really rough times – relationship struggles, financial difficulties, health problems – yet each storm has come to an end at some point in time.

We have this tendency to think that what we are currently facing is the hardest thing to ever happen and that we aren't going to make it through. But then tomorrow comes and we make it. Yes, there are tears; yes, there is pain; yes, we feel as if we are about to take our very last breath…but the storm calms and we make it.

No storm lasts forever. It may seem like they do, but if you take time to look back at everything you have come through…you have made it to the other side of some crazy, difficult and troubling times…but you’ve come through. That’s the important part. You made it. Life didn't overtake you. You didn’t crumble. Somehow, some way, the storm ended and you managed to see the sun shine and the rainbow light up the sky. You will do it again, too.

Today, you may feel as if you are surrounded by an earthquake, strong winds, a downpour, tsunami or lightening. You may even feel like they are all hitting you at once, but even this crazy, mixed-up storm has an end. Don’t lose heart. Don’t lose hope. Let the winds blow and the rains fall, but know that you are going to make it. You have endured much already, you will endure this too. Hold on!"

TV Review: Crossing Lines

You know how I love Box Sets – watched quite a few of them in my life.  Recently I came across a series I had never heard of but looked intriguing to me so I decided to try it.  It is called “Crossing Lines” and is an American/European drama bases in the International Crime Court (The ICC) in The Hague, Amsterdam.

It follows the ins and outs of the ICC’s special crime unit which investigates crimes that happen within Europe – not just in one country but across many of them. The unit includes an anti-organised crime covert specialist from Germany, a crime analyst from France, and a weapons specialist and tactical expert from Northern Ireland.  There are also people from Holland, Italy, England, America and France.

Crimes investigated include:

• ·         Four women murdered in parks in different major European cities
• ·         Men being seduced and poisoned so pieces of their art collection could be stolen
• ·         A murder ring involving European truck drivers, kidnapping etc.

Along with these cases, there are a couple of stories running in the background relating to team members:

• ·         The death of the son of Major Daniels (Marc Lavoine – Italy), the team leader.  Many questions surrounded this, who killed him and why?
• ·         Carl Hickman (William Ficthner – American) a former NYPD Officer left the force because he was injured by Philip Genovese (Kim Coates), who is a sex trafficking criminal.  Hickman is currently living In Amsterdam in a carnival and Genovese turns up here during season one.  They are both hunting each other.  Finally they come face to face in a show down which ends up in Genovese being injured – he is arrested and taken to hospital.  Hickman thinks it is all over but unfortunately for him Genovese escapes.

Here is one of the reasons why I started watching this series – Philip Genovese is played by Kim Coates (my new Celebrity crush!).  But it is a cool series. I like the international feel to it and how the unit investigates crimes throughout Europe and they all use their different skills and talents to solve these crimes.

Personal lives of the other unit members are shown but they don’t overtake the criminal investigations, which can happen in other shows. 

I have now finished Season 1 and after a break I have now begun Season 2.  And yes Genovese is back again in this season so let’s see what happens now!  Apparently there is a Season 3, just need to wait till it comes to Amazon Prime for free. 

Faith: Love and Fear

Previously on my blog I have posted / retold / stolen blog posts from Emma Scriviner and am about to do the same again.  Her recent one called A Greater Safety made me think and it seemed as if she was talking about me – it relates to many people I am sure

How would you describe yourself? Not the outside appearance: the inside.  YOU. What parts do you love? And what bits do you hate?

Chances are, the bits you like least are the very parts that God can use most.

The soft heart that’s easily crushed.

The fears that turn you to prayer.

The grief that helps you comfort.

The weakness that looks to His strength.

Sparrow hearts, fluttering in our palms.

The unlikely

The lesser

The least presentable.

These things we hide - sometimes, they’re what’s most real about us. And in God’s hands, they’re the most precious.

But these are the parts we’re tempted to squash - or take for granted.

Sometimes I feel I have a dirty secret – and the secret is me. I don’t want to be in the light because I hate what I might see.

Little things terrify me. Being out of control. New people. New places. Honesty.  Vulnerability.

Why do I despise them? Because the enemy attacks the bits of us that are best and brightest.

A hunger for justice - that spills into anger.

The desire to bless – that becomes a need to be needed.

A quick wit – that crushes and cuts.

I’m ashamed and fearful and doubting and weak. I don’t want anyone to see it.  So I put my head down and keep small and safe. I turn inwards.  I listen to the lies. Except that occasionally, I don’t.

Sometimes I step out. That’s when I’m most real. That’s what draws me to the community I fear.

However, stronger than the fear is the freedom that Christ has bought. And deeper than the shame, is the truth.

I’m a mess. But the the blood of Jesus is for me as well. And if He covers over me, He covers over you. I’d stake my life on it. Because He’s already  staked His.

On the cross, the greatest wickedness became the most stunning redemption. But if you’d asked those Calvary bystanders, “do you see the beauty here?” they’d have thought the question in poor taste. As we follow Jesus, crosses become resurrections, shame becomes glory, the parts we despise are redeemed.  What looks like weakness is turned to strength.

We reach across to others – because we see them limping too. We see in them the things we hate in ourselves: softness, the neediness, the feeling too much. But now, it looks different.